Sunday, June 8, 2008

Everyone does not need someone

One of the stories I was forced to endure at my parent's anniversary party was about Love. I capitalize because I need to in this case. This is really bothering me! Here's what happened:

I was attempting to clean up the room where the desserts were being served since it was almost time for guests to leave, and I didn't think anyone was in there. I was cornered by someone and was asked about MB and what was going on with him and what does he do for work and how did you meet again and blah blah blah. And then this person said something to the effect of "It's so great that you met someone because everyone needs someone and anyone who claims they don't is denying their own happiness and indeed very own existence and don't you look nice together and where is it going" and a bunch of crap statements and questions that I wasn't crazy about.

What was even more uncomfortable is that this person has known me for years since my marriage 10 years ago (now ex-marriage for over 7 years) and it was as if they wanted me to compare. I did no such thing since that is certainly none of anyone's business!!! I disagree with the whole "everyone needs someone" thing anyway because there are times when it's not at all good to be with someone; in fact, during those times it is very much better to be alone completely. Anyone who has been in a bad relationship or in a sad time knows this very well. When a person is ready for a relationship and they have figured out what they want, they meet someone and things fall into place. Timing is everything! I really believe that. It sounds a little like magic, but it happens to people all the time, not just with love, but with jobs, grades, relationships with friends, and lots of other things.

I felt like it was bad manners to disagree too much at my parents' party (felt foolish afterward for not cutting off that person's jabbering politely with something honest but clever) and I kept trying to slide toward the door and finally got out of there and escaped to the living room where MB sat in my mom's chair. Phew! Thank goodness that was over. I avoided that person the rest of the time they were around.

At dinner this weekend with MB I guess he thought I seemed down (I wasn't, I was just hot and hungry) and he asked if anything was wrong. One convo led to another and I asked him at my mom's behest if he had been cornered and grilled by anyone as I had been because then she would have to kick some major butt. When I had told her about the "Cake-Room Incident", she was really pissed off and even gasped and wanted to know right away if the same thing happened to MB. He said "no", thankfully. "Why do you ask?" I explained what went down and that it was bullshit and that a friend from work felt the same way as I did and so did my mom, expecting he would say the same. But he said nothing, not even "mm-hmm". It was one of those awkward moments in time where all you can hear are crickets. So I kind of got upset without meaning to because OMG, he clearly doesn't agree with me on this very important issue!!!??? It felt weird.

Anyway, next day and I'm still thinking about MB not saying anything. Sigh. His ability to verbalize is something I find attractive, and to not get any kind of answer from him leaves me in the lurch. I'm debating asking him about it, but maybe it's nothing. Maybe he doesn't agree with either point of view. Would that be better or worse?

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